Day 15 - Bah Hum Bug

I'm tired, I'm cranky, and I think my fingers are becoming long and green. It's not because I'm eating lots of raw veggies (I wish. Cold weather makes me not want anything but soup and hot cocoa.) but more like I'm turning into the Grinch. Not that I want to steal all the gifts in Whoville and make my dog pull the overloaded sleigh, but that I don't feel joyful. It's just the honest truth.
I've felt the spirit of scrooge wanting to creep in all day long. I haven't had the joy of giving that has been so prevalent the last few weeks. I've enjoyed this experiment so much, but for some reason I feel very discouraged today.

When I got home tonight, I was exhausted. I forced myself to sit down and find a Christmas movie on TV. A Christmas Carol was on. Godronic? I would say so. I was glued to the scene where Jacob Marley comes back to haunt Ebenezer and share with him about what he's learned, trying to prevent Ebenezer from spending eternity in bondage.

I asked myself why I'm feeling like these characters - the Grinch and Scrooge? What do they have in common? Both characters are self-centered, stingy, reclusive, and down right mean. Each of them have had their hearts broken and have been hurt by the ones they loved the most. They're lonely and their heart is cold. They think of nothing but what makes them happy and no one else but themselves. Ouch - could this really be me?

The good news is at the end of How the Grinch Stole Christmas "the Grinch's heart grew three sizes that day" and Ebeneezer Scrooge had a radical life change and helped ALL those around him - God Bless Us Everyone!

That's what I want - to 'feel' Christmas again! I want to be in the spirit of the season. I need to know the peace, again, that should reign in my heart (that hopefully will grow 3 sizes bigger!). I need to rest and be thankful for all the opportunities that God has given me.

But what do I have to do to get out of this funk?

Behold, I bring you great joy! (Now that sounds good. JOY!) I bring you good news of great joy that will be for all the people. Today in the town of David a Savior has been born to you; he is Christ the Lord. This will be a sign to you: You will find a baby wrapped in cloths and lying in a manger."Suddenly a great company of the heavenly host appeared with the angel, praising God and saying, "Glory to God in the highest, and on earth peace to men."

I'm going to 'behold the great joy' that is coming in only a few short days and enjoy the peace.