December 21, 2008
Day 21 - What's Your Story?
I've been writing this blog only a few weeks now. I'm amazed by two things: 1) that you've stopped by to read it and are applying it to your life - thank you! and 2) how this Generosity Experiment has changed my life. (I'll write more on that after Christmas.) I wonder what your experience has been like so far with your own Generosity Experiment? I wonder what you've applied and how your life has changed? I wonder what your '7 Pounds' story is?
I would love to share your Generosity Experiment story with others. Please email me or leave your story in the comment section of this post.
And if you haven't noticed, Christmas is only a few days away. Yippee! Since my husband and I will be traveling during the holidays, to see family and friends, I probably won't be posting until after Christmas (unless there is an amazing, Godronic story to share of giving, then I will of course log on and post!). I'm looking forward to sharing with you what I've learned during the Generosity Experiment and how it's changed my life.
December 19, 2008
Gift Idea for Guests
I wrapped the plate and assortment of cookies in clear cellophane with a red ribbon, hole punching our Christmas card and tying it on as the bow. I passed each party favor out as my neighbors left last night from the Chili Christmas Party to walk home.
Beneath the cookies lies a very important message that I hope each couple will take to heart this Christmas: the gift that fits every heart is Jesus. He is the true gift.
Day 19 - Thank You Note
My husband arrived home and wasn't greeted by the usual hug and a kiss or a "How was your day?", but a haggard "Hey." I don't even think I made eye contact with him. (Shame on me!) He didn't complain but jumped into the kitchen flurry to help make our 1st Annual Chili Christmas Party a big hit. (We had so much fun with our neighbors last night! They loved the tree, the food, and our home. I'm so thankful to live in a place where we can share a meal and some laughs with those who live near and to begin new friendships, beyond the 'driveway to driveway wave.'
I've learned something about myself - when I feel stressed, and starting to head toward panic, I start to think negatively and complain. It's terrible, I know, but a very human thing to do. Still, no excuse.
This morning I found this amazing verse: "Don't worry about anything; instead pray about everything. Tell God what you need and thank Him for what He's done. If you do this, you will experience God's peace, which is far more wonderful than the human mind can understand." (Phillippians 4:6-7)
Usually, I would have focused on the 'don't worry' section of the verse or to 'pray about everything' in my life - my needs, deepest desires, and what's on my to-do list for the day. But today, the part that stuck out to me was 'and thank Him for what He's done.' Yes, God wants me to tell Him what I need, but I'm supposed to equally thank Him for what He's already accomplished in my life.
I tried to do just that as I was getting ready this morning, thank God for He's done in my life. I noticed that within a few mental sentences, I was right back to thinking about my needs, desires, and to-do's for the day ahead. I can tell this is going to be more difficult that I thought. . .
My mother taught me to write thank you notes after every birthday and Christmas, so I'm applying that concept and challenging myself (and you) to take time over the next few days to write down what God has done in my life over the last year, even the last few days. Get out a piece of paper (you may need more than one) and write out where you have seen God take care of you and fulfill all your needs. You can do this solo or as a family activity. You can do it one time or throughout the Christmas season, even on a daily basis.
When you're finished, roll up the paper and tie a red ribbon around it. Place it on your tree. On Christmas morning you can read each of them and celebrate all God has done for you. Keep it with your ornaments when you store your decorations and next year you'll have a great reminder of what God has done. Over the years you'll be able to have documentation of God's work in your family's life.
If you're thinking, "Well, that won't take much, I'm thankful I have a job, a home, clothes, food, and my family. The end." That's a great start, but get more detailed. Think about what you can't control and all the Godronic moments and the Godincidences that have just seemed to work out in your favor.
A few things that come to my mind to put on my list:
- A husband that loves me, serves me, has an amazing work ethic, is patient with me, and has uncompromising integrity.
- Fresh water to drink and choices of food for every meal. I've never gone hungry.
- A warm home, a comfy bed and pillow, soft sheets, and a wonderful husband to cuddle up with at night.
- Safety on all my travels. Getting to go to places I've dreampt about.
- A vehicle that runs and is safe.
- A huge closet that is full of clothing options for every day and season.
- A job where I can use my passion and skills that He has provided.
- A family that loves God and me.
- The opportunity and freedom to celebrate Christmas!
My list will definately go on and on. What will be on your 'Thank You' note this year to the Giver of all good gifts?
December 18, 2008
Day 18 - 2 Little Words
I braved Walmart yesterday afternoon for a new cookie sheet. (Call me crazy, but it was time to replace mine that is rusting and unsightly!) In a matter of 2 minutes my theory was proven in the parking lot.
By the way, my theory is that most people think their vehicle is a huge force field that makes them invisible. Their vehicle keeps them incognito, allowing them to do things they might not normally do face to face. What evidence do I have to prove this theory, you ask? I'm sure you've experienced people picking their nose while at a stop light, singing at the top of their lungs to the radio, or leaning on their horn when things don't go just their way. I rest my case.
In a matter of moments in the Walmart parking lot. . . First,there was a huge diesel truck that was blazing through the lot and honked his deep fog horn as a woman in a compact car was trying to carefully back out. There was the 'space shark.' You know, the driver that slowly lurks through the parking lot and follows every person with a full shopping cart, hoping that their space will be the closest to the door, causing a traffic jam behind her and not taking the space if it's too far out. And then there was the SUV driver that made sure all shoppers standing at the crosswalk knew he was in a hurry and was going to drive over them if he needed to, completely ignoring the sign that said 'yield to pedestrians' sitting among the bright yellow crosswalk lines.
Can you feel the Christmas spirit?
As I caught myself at the crosswalk, waiting for the SUV to pass by as not to be run over (I don't want to spend the holidays dead!), I realized that any parking lot for the next week will be a great test of Generosity.
What if I passed the space closer to the door and gave it to the 'space shark?' (There are side benefits to Generosity. . . I don't know about you but I've fallen off the wagon when it comes to what I eat. Cookies? You betcha! Another scoop of casserole? Why not?! So, what will it hurt if I walk a few more feet to the store doors? Maybe January won't be so hard this way.) What if I patiently waited in my car for every vehicle to back out before me or pass by before I pulled out of my space? What if I waited on every pedestrian, even if they looked like they could take awhile? What if when someone honked at me, I waved and smiled, and prayed that their Christmas would be special? What if I brought Jesus with me to the parking lot?
What will your 'give' be as you drive to complete all of your last minute Christmas errands?
December 16, 2008
Stunned
That happened to me today. I was working with a friend of mine and she received a phone call from her husband. It was strange for him to call in the middle of the day, so she picked it up. What followed was a distant stare on her face and a lot of "Uh huh"s and "Okay." I didn't want to intrude, but she seemed concerned.
I asked, "Is everything okay?" She replied, "Oh, he's fine. He was calling to tell me about a woman at our church and a ham that we're going to give her. It's so sad. Her husband walked out on her for another woman. She has five kids from 4-17 yrs old. She's stayed home with them throughout their marriage, has no work experience, and is now working as a cashier at Walmart trying to make ends meet."
That's when I was stunned.
Questions zipped out, as I asked, "Is he paying child support?" Before she even answered, I had a hunch what the answer would be. "No," she said with disgust. "He moved to another state and they don't even know where he is. Her family isn't helping her out either. She's very much alone in this terrible situation."
My heart was ripped out yet pounding in my ears. I can't imagine going through such heartache with my husband leaving and for another woman. I can't imagine trying to support 5 children and explain to them what's going on, while reassuring them that God cares for them more than their earthly Father. I can't imagine the worry and fear I would feel trying to reenter the work force and wondering if I would be able to keep my family off the streets.
I was stunned, but God wasn't.
I know that she is not exactly a widow, even though she has been left by herself, and the children aren't technically, orphans since they have their mother, but I think that when God says "Religion that [He] accepts as pure and faultless is this: to look after orphans and widows in their distress" completely applies to this situation and so many that are similar.
The good news is our church is aware of it and is helping the family. I will be talking to my husband tonight about how we can be part of the solution. But what family in your neighborhood, church, or child's school is going through a similar circumstance right now?
Please pray for this family and all of those that are suffering from a broken heart this Christmas.
Honesty is the Best Policy
I'm sure God was waiting for me to say, "Help! I need your peace and real joy. I can't seem to find any at the mall or get any that will last from finding the next 'give'." He already knew my heart but was waiting for me to come to him with my soulful ache. That's the only place that I can find true hope, peace, and joy - in Jesus.
Recently, at the Nashville Tree Lighting Ceremony, a song was sung that represents something that we all need. Make sure your speakers are turned up. The video isn't the best, but the song is so true. Can you guess who's singing under the hat and coat?
Day 16 - A Simple White Envelope
"It's just a small white envelope stuck among the branches of our Christmas tree. No name, no identification, no inscription. It has peeked through the branches of our tree for the past 10 years or so. It all began because my husband Mike hated Christmas, oh, not the true meaning of Christmas, but the commercial aspects of it -- the overspending, the frantic running around at the last minute to get a tie for Uncle Harry and the dusting powder for Grandma the gifts given in desperation because you couldn't think of anything else.
Knowing he felt this way, I decided one year to bypass the usual shirts, sweaters, ties, and so forth. I reached for something special just for Mike. The inspiration came in an unusual way. Our son Kevin, who was 12 that year, was wrestling at the junior level at the school he attended. Shortly before Christmas, there was a non-league match against another team sponsored by an inner-city church. These youngsters, dressed in sneakers so ragged that shoestrings seemed to be the only thing holding them together, presented a sharp contrast to our boys in their spiffy blue and gold uniforms and sparkling new wrestling shoes.
As the match began, I was alarmed to see that the other team was wrestling without headgear, a kind of light helmet designed to protect a wrestler's ears. It was a luxury the ragtag team obviously could not afford. Well, we ended up walloping them. We took every weight class. And as each of their boys got up from the mat, he swaggered around in his tatters with false bravado, a kind of street pride that couldn't acknowledge defeat. Mike, seated beside me, shook his head sadly, "I wish just one of them could have won," he said. "They have a lot of potential, but losing like this could take the heart right out of them."
Mike loved kids all kids and he knew them, having coached little league football, baseball, and lacrosse. That's when the idea for his present came. That afternoon, I went to a local sporting goods store and bought an assortment of wrestling headgear and shoes and sent them anonymously to the inner-city church. On Christmas Eve, I placed the envelope on the tree, the note inside telling Mike what I had done and that this was his gift from me.
His smile was the brightest thing about Christmas that year and in succeeding years. For each Christmas, I followed the tradition one year sending a group of mentally handicapped youngsters to a hockey game, another year a check to a pair of elderly brothers whose home had burned to the ground the week before Christmas, And on and on.
The simple white envelope became the highlight of our Christmas. It was always the last thing opened on Christmas morning. Our children, ignoring their new toys, would stand with wide-eyed anticipation as their dad lifted the envelope from the tree to reveal its contents. As the children grew, the toys gave way to more practical presents, but the envelope never lost its allure.
The story doesn't end there. You see, we lost Mike last year to cancer. When Christmas rolled around, I was still so wrapped in grief that I barely got the tree up. But Christmas Eve found me placing an envelope on the tree, and in the morning it was joined by three more. Each of our children, unbeknownst to the others, had placed an envelope on the tree for their dad.
The tradition has grown and someday will expand even further with our grandchildren standing around the tree with wide-eyed anticipation watching as their fathers take down the envelope. Mike's spirit, like the Christmas spirit, will always be with us.
May we all remember Christ, who is the reason for the season, and the true Christmas spirit this year and always. God Bless!"
There is still plenty of time before Christmas to start such a lovely and powerful giving tradition. What will your white envelope be this year - that will impact your family, community, and generations to come?
December 15, 2008
Day 15 - Bah Hum Bug
I've felt the spirit of scrooge wanting to creep in all day long. I haven't had the joy of giving that has been so prevalent the last few weeks. I've enjoyed this experiment so much, but for some reason I feel very discouraged today.
When I got home tonight, I was exhausted. I forced myself to sit down and find a Christmas movie on TV. A Christmas Carol was on. Godronic? I would say so. I was glued to the scene where Jacob Marley comes back to haunt Ebenezer and share with him about what he's learned, trying to prevent Ebenezer from spending eternity in bondage.
I asked myself why I'm feeling like these characters - the Grinch and Scrooge? What do they have in common? Both characters are self-centered, stingy, reclusive, and down right mean. Each of them have had their hearts broken and have been hurt by the ones they loved the most. They're lonely and their heart is cold. They think of nothing but what makes them happy and no one else but themselves. Ouch - could this really be me?
The good news is at the end of How the Grinch Stole Christmas "the Grinch's heart grew three sizes that day" and Ebeneezer Scrooge had a radical life change and helped ALL those around him - God Bless Us Everyone!
That's what I want - to 'feel' Christmas again! I want to be in the spirit of the season. I need to know the peace, again, that should reign in my heart (that hopefully will grow 3 sizes bigger!). I need to rest and be thankful for all the opportunities that God has given me.
But what do I have to do to get out of this funk?
Behold, I bring you great joy! (Now that sounds good. JOY!) I bring you good news of great joy that will be for all the people. Today in the town of David a Savior has been born to you; he is Christ the Lord. This will be a sign to you: You will find a baby wrapped in cloths and lying in a manger."Suddenly a great company of the heavenly host appeared with the angel, praising God and saying, "Glory to God in the highest, and on earth peace to men."
I'm going to 'behold the great joy' that is coming in only a few short days and enjoy the peace.
December 12, 2008
Day 12 - Secret Elf Update
A co-worker had to take off work, unpaid, because a close relative passed away. I donated the last of the money I had taken out of the bank at the beginning of this Experiment to help her with Christmas expenses. Hopefully it will help, even if it's just lunch on me or an extra roll of giftwrap.
Update: I called my mom and told her to log onto the blog and read the Mission: Secret Elf post. As she read it aloud, she got choked up and I could tell she was really touched. She told me, "This is the best Christmas present you could have given me this year!" It's so exhilerating to truly help someone when they feel alone and in despair.Mom was concerned that grandma and I were driving down tonight and leaving tomorrow evening. "That's only 24 hours!" she said. "No worries, mom!" I giggled, "If Santa can fly his sleigh around the world in 24 hours and deliver toys to billions of children, then I think these two little secret elves can handle this decorating challenge."
I'm driving the sleigh to my parents' home tonight. Mission: Secret Elf will be officially underway. . . I'm pumped!
So. . . (feel free to hum along, or sing quietly at your desk!)
Haul out the holly;
Put up the tree before my spirit falls again.
Fill up the stockings,I may be rushing things,
But deck the halls again now.
For we need a little Christmas
Right this very minute,
Candles in the window,
Carols at the spinet.
Yes, we need a little Christmas Right. . . NOW!
December 11, 2008
12 Days of Christmas
According to most, the 12 Days of Christmas (watch a funny version) starts with Christmas and goes until January 6th. But for this 'give,' I'm using it like advent, starting December 13th, and ending on Christmas Eve. I understand there are different takes on the 12 Days of Christmas, some believe in the hidden meaning of the song, which I enjoy because of all the symbolism, but that's not my focus today.
As promised, here is another idea from Real Simple for giving to less fortunate and applying the concept of the 12 Days of Christmas. Deborah Sorbo from Mountain Lakes, New Jersey wrote in: "My kids and I choose a family in our town that we know is going through a difficult time and becme their secret elves for the 12 days before Christmas. Each day we drop off small decorations and goodies with little cards. By the morning of December 25, their house looks festive, they've enjoyed a few treats, and their holidays have hopefully been easier and happier. We have a blast trying to leave the gifts for them without being found out, and we never reveal our identity!"
To understand how to truly help other families in need, here is an amazing story from someone that has experienced poverty and what she learned. Reading this will help you understand how to better help those going through the same situation.
And if you're racking your brain and can't come up with anyone that you could do this 'give for, then start a new tradition with the 12 Days of Christmas at your home with these great ideas!
Day 11 - Finding Great JOY
Ah, to live another day - another demonstration of God's mercy. I took a deep breath of cold, fresh air and was thankful. God reminded me there is a purpose for me in His plan. I love those moments where I have stilled myself and God shows up. Hopefully I will know each of the moments He gives me today. . . I hope the same for you, too.
After returning inside, I found this quote in my Hugs Daily Inspirations for Women: "God's plan for our lives includes great JOY, but our heavenly Father will not force His joy upon us. We must accept His peace on our own - no one can accept it for us. Today, lets claim the joy God has provided for us by praising the Creator for the gift of life. Then let's share His love and His joy. When we do, we'll be blessed and bless all whom God has chosen to place along our paths."
That pretty much sums it up for me: Fill my heart with PURE JOY so I may overflow to those on my path today.
December 10, 2008
Day 10 - Thankful Giver
I know that I'm tired. I feel like I've experienced 5 days in 3. Know that feeling? I think the Christmasing is catching up with me. I work a full time job and then come home and address Christmas cards, bake 4 dozen cookies for the neighborhood cookie exchange, shop for gifts and wrapping, keep up with the laundry. . .well you know what I'm talking about. Every person is feeling it in some way or another. It's all wonderful and things I enjoy experiencing, but I am feeling the need for some quality time to relax.
As I've been looking back over the day, here is what I've observed and learned;
- the elderly man standing behind me in line at Walmart was an opportunity to share a warm smile and take the time to have a much needed conversation
- that the change left in the self checkout line register was not meant for me and could make someone else's day, so I left it
- that the Salvation Army bell ringer remembering me and my gifts over the last week was fun
- and that extra warm cookies from the cookie exchange preparations to my husband is pure LOVE.
The other thing I'm observing while I'm on this journey - and almost halfway complete with The Generosity Experiment - is that I'm becoming a thankful giver. It's really exhilarating to know that I'm part of something much bigger than myself and that God is using me, to change others and myself for the better. God loves a cheerful giver and that's exactly what He's making me, more lovable.
But if I want more opportunities to give of myself and to make a difference for Jesus this Christmas, I need to devote myself to prayer, being watchful and thankful (my version of Colossions 4:2) for the opportunities to give from Him. I must stay connected to the Source of all giving and rely on Jesus for the opportunities and the energy to give, and not on my good intentions.
December 09, 2008
Day 9 - Mission: Secret Elf
During the conversation, my mom asked me what we had been up to. I proceeded to tell her about the Christmas parties and baking for the neighborhood cookie exchange. She asked, "Did you finish decorating your tree?" I knew where this was headed. I answered, "Yes." but knew that wasn't helping her feel any more at peace. Her response implied that she was way behind and almost in panic mode about Christmas. She knew that there were 16 days until Christmas, "actually 14," she reminded me, "since you all will be here and I want to have everything ready and beautiful by then." She hasn't decorated the house yet and hasn't had a chance to go Christmas shopping for any gifts.
My heart ached, not just for her predicament - feeling behind with her Christmas preparations and taking care of my Dad while he's sick (which she willingly and lovingly does!) - but because I no longer live in the same town as my parents and can't help out.
I used to be able to run over after work or on a Saturday afternoon and help with whatever needed to be done. And since mom has ALWAYS been there for me (staying a week when we moved to help unpack boxes and decorate our new home, driving 3 hours to see me when my husband was out of town, helping me do landscaping at every house I've lived in. . . well, you get the idea. She's very loving and giving!)
So, I called my grandmother this morning and started scheming. "Lets be secret elves!" I told her, as I gave her the update on the situation. "Lets drive down Friday night. Then on Saturday we can help her decorate her house and put the tree up. What do you think?" She was immediately on board and excited about the idea. But my grandmother is a spontaneous, generous person anyway, so this was an expected response. (Hopefully, Dad will be feeling better and back to work by the end of the week.)
Mission Secret Elf has commenced. We're driving the sleigh down Friday and putting our Christmas Cheer skills to work!
Is there anyone that you can help with their Christmas preparations? I'm sure there is a busy single mom, a friend that's been sick, or a co-worker that has been traveling too much for their job that you could help decorate their home or shop for their gifts. You can add Christmas cheer to someone's spirit!
December 08, 2008
Christmas Party Hostess Gifts & Party Favors
I thought about that over the weekend and realized a lot has changed, but really shouldn't have. I'm invited to a few Christmas parties this month. I'm looking forward to them and thankful that someone has put me on their list and checked it twice! (I know that sounds strange since most people I overhear complaining about all the parties that they have to attend. Just think back to what it was like as a child and get excited about not sitting at home watching a TV show that you won't remember.)
I attended a Christmas party recently and brought a Hostess gift. Something that cost me very little, Christmas tea towels wrapped with a sparkely bow. (Here are some cute ones from Very Verdant on Etsy.) It's not much, but the gift expresses a simple thank you to those that hosted the party, letting them know I realize how much work it is to put on a simple celebration and how grateful I am that I am able to be a part of the festivities. Will you remember those that have invited you to help them celebrate the holidays with a small token of your appreciation?
By the way, 'It's a Chili Christmas' open house is on. I'm passing out the invites to my neighbors tonight. It should be fun to get to know them better and have more than a driveway to driveway 2 minute conversation! I don't expect a hostess gift from any of my future friends, but I have thought about what I will pass out as party favors. DaySpring has quite a few wonderful, inexpensive items that I've been checking out. I think I'm going to do some extra baking and add cookies to this cute plate, wrap it up with cellophane and send them home with sweet treats and sugar plum dreams.
Thank You!
I especially want to thank fellower bloggers, like Rocks In My Dryer and Simple Mom, for posting about this blog and encouraging their readers to take the challenge.
Advent Conspiracy - It's Godronic!
It's all very Godronic. (I just made this word up, but will start using it and hope you do, too!) Not ironic, that focues on I. But Godronic - it's when the puzzle pieces of life fit so smoothly together and all the details are obviously connected. It's such a God moment and at the same time there is such irony, like a beautiful, wonder filled story is unfolding. Godronic!
You can also check out http://www.adventconspiracy.org/ for more info on how you can be a part of giving clean drinking water to the world.
Day 8 - A Night Out Without The Kids
She didn't know what I had been working on. It's even anonymous from her, too. We were catching up and sharing what our plans were for the weekend. She mentioned that her small group leaders at her church in Denver have four children, two are adopted from Guatemala. She and another friend had volunteered to babysit their children Saturday night as a Christmas gift, so the couple could go out and do Christmas shopping or just spend a romantic evening together.
I thought her story was so ironic, especially since she had no idea what I've been up to in secret. It made me wonder how I could do that? Who do we know that would be blessed by such a treat? Our next door neighbors of course! It's always right under my nose.
Our neighbors have a son with special needs and is wheelchair bound. I'm going to write a coupon in their Christmas card For A Free Night of BabySitting. Hopefully they will take us up on the offer. It should be fun and a great way to keep the generosity going after Christmas.
December 07, 2008
Sharing A Simple Meal
Consider inviting some friends or neighbors over for a relaxed dinner during the week. Nothing fancy and not a dinner party. Just a spontaneous phone call will put a smile on the end of the line. It's a rare treat to share a simple meal together and so rarely done nowadays.
We decided this morning that we had too much food for the two of us to eat by ourselves, so we invited a friend of ours' over for lunch. My husband called this morning and asked. Nothing planned. Nothing fancy. But I'm sure our friend appreciated the thought and will enjoy my husband's downhome cooking as much as I do.
True Peace & Rest
But to be honest, that doesn't work into my schedule easily with everything I need to get done for the holidays. Now that's an ironic statement and something I'm sure grieves God. I'm trying to prepare my home, my family, my gifts, and my heart for Christmas and I'm missing the entire reason Christ was born into this world - to give me eternal rest and peace that starts now.
I'm sure rest is a 'give' that God is trying to give me but I don't seem to accept it well. To relax is not wrong, but sometimes it's difficult. To have true rest in my spirit is hard, but can be accomplished. I do want true peace this Christmas - the kind that I don't feel for a few minutes first thing in the morning when the world is not yet awake, but the kind that radiates from within me. The peace that starts in my heart because Jesus Christ has saved me and taken over my life, my sin, and my worries, and given me peace and rest in exchange.
I don't want to become a do-gooder with no love or a busy giver without peace. If I'm not connected to the source of Love, then what good are my actions. If I'm only busy running from one giving opportunity to the next, how am I any different than those that don't have the love of Christ in them and are only doing 'gives' out of guilt.
Maybe this is one of my personal 'gives' to God ---- taking a day of rest. But the funny thing is, that I benefit, too! Isn't that like our Savior? To ask us to do something for Him and yet we are so blessed because of it.
What do you do on Sundays to rest, enjoy peace, and stay connected to Jesus?
Day 7: How to Give Back During the Holidays
In the front of the magazine, where the table of contents and editorial notes are, I just happened upon an article that impacted my thinking. (This is funny to me since I rarely, if ever, read this section in a magazine. Usually I start at the back of the magazine and work my way forward.)
Just a small tangent: This article proves I find what I need when I'm really searching for it. That's the way this entire experiment has been so far. I'm focused on giving, so there seem to be a plethora of opportunities that arise daily. I wonder if those opportunities were always there and I didn't see them before Dec 1st, because I was too busy with my schedule and my life? Or is God providing the opportunities for generosity because I'm finally ready to listen and act quickly?
As a friend of mine used to say, anywho. . . back to the story.
The editors at Real Simple asked their readers a question: 'How do you give back during the holidays?' The answers and ideas were so intriguing, and one of the inspirations for this blog, that I thought I would share some of the ideas throughout the next 18 days. (That's how many days are left 'til Christmas. Don't panic. Get a paper bag and take deep breaths. It's going to be OK.)
Andrea Brown from Springdale, AR adapted a holiday tradition from The Ultimate Gift. (A great movie by the way, and something I hadn't thought of to watch during the holidays.) Her family would decide at Thanksgiving an amount of money to put aside, then they would secretly spend it in a random, kindhearted way. They each had until Christmas Eve to complete the task, and reveal to the rest of the family on Christmas Day. What a great tradition to start now and continue every year! (I found other interesting products, besides the DVD, that you need to check out while you're doing your Christmas shopping.)
Connie Hanks in San Diego, California bakes two extra pies and delivers them to her local fire station. It's a small way to show appreciation for all of their hard work and sacrificial dedication to your community. You can also do this for your local police station, too, even if they did stop you last month for going a few miles over the speed limit!
Beth Groner from Clifton, Virginia convinced her coworkers to bring a wrapped gift for Toys for Tots in lieu of presents for an office gift exchange. You can do the same things with your coworkers, small group at church, or your neighbors. It's amazing what toys you can buy for under $10, so every child will have a smile on their face Christmas morning.
December 06, 2008
Day 6 - Even Steven
The amazing thing is how God provides in unique ways. . . and helps me with my skeptism about people. This morning we had a wonderful family from our church offer to buy one of our dogs. Our sweet dog has destoryed everything in our backyard, God love 'em. (I know by now you're wondering if we're running a kennel. We're definately not! The funny thing is I'm much more of a cat person. But dogs seems to be a theme in our lives over the last few days.)
This family wants their son to be surprised for Christmas with his new outside playmate. They are caring and sweet people that will love this dog like we have. Guess how much they are giving us for the dog? The same amount that we would be out for the puppy incident. Hmmm. I think there is more going on here. What do you think?
Through the odd, and sometimes very emotional, past 36 hours, I've heard God say, 'Keep being generous. Keep giving without strings attached. Keep being a good steward of what I've given you. Keep opening your heart and loving even when it hurts.'
I'm sure there have been difficult 'gives' for you this week. I would be encouraged by your stories. Please share with me and others about it.
December 05, 2008
Day 5 - Puppy Poo & Kisses, Too! Oh My.
Pop! What was that sound - oh yea, my bubble bursting.
Our friends and family are NOT perfect. I know, shocking huh? I'm sure you can't relate at all. (Smirk.) We got a phone call yesterday from a friend asking if we could buy a very expensive puppy for them and they would pick it up on Saturday and pay us for it then. They live a few hours away. (My thoughts immediately went to 'How many nights of crying and whining is that?!') My husband, being the service oriented guy that he is, quickly agreed.
So, after going Christmas shopping for a few hours last night (trying to avoid the situation), I was greeted at the door by a cute little dog, a wagging little tail, and puppy breath kisses. She's adorable - which helps the situation. She reminds me of the dog on Lady and The Tramp. Not that I should name her and get too attached, but I've been calling her Lady anyway. A dog with no name is just sad.
But as the compassionate woman that I am, in the last few hours I've helped clean up messes in the floor, found toys for her to play with, and gave up my favorite blanket for her bed. (It was the only one that I thought probably felt most like her mother and would help her sleep.)
We got a phone call later in the evening to let us know that the friend that's supposed to pick up the puppy on Saturday is having problem paying her rent. . . and may want us to foot the very expensive bill for the dog. Ugh. It was like a kick in the stomach, to both of us. Here we were, trying to help someone give their children a memorable Christmas and come to find out we may be conned. We didn't talk much about it (sometimes those things take awhile to sink in) but we're hoping for the best on Saturday.
I did have an epiphany about the situation and true Generosity around 2AM. It was the 4th time that I was up, in my fuzzy robe and slippers, to stop Lady from crying. I held her every time, stroked her white and reddish-brown fur, and prayed that she would quickly go to sleep, so I could, too. More than once through the night I was awoken in the recliner by puppy kisses and a small wimper. There are perks to every situation. But enough sweet mushy stuff. . . back to the epiphany.
The thought crossed my mind, 'Why am I doing this? Why do I care?' Then I remembered a verse "Give to the one who asks you, and do not turn away from the one who wants to borrow from you." Matthew 5:42 Ouch. Those verses are painful to the justice that resides in me. The part of me that says 'That's not fair! Why should we be taken advantage of?!'
So far we are giving to those that have asked of us and hoping for the best. But it's not easy. (Big SURPRISE! No one said it would be.) We're praying for guidance and what to do on Saturday, no matter what happens. But I'm sure there is a reason for all of it, even if I can't see it at the moment.
If nothing else, it's nice to have unspoiled love from one of God's precious creatures.
December 04, 2008
What Charities Do I Give To This Christmas?
Day 4 - Monthly Giving: Compassion International Child
I would love to hear what you give to on a monthly basis that makes a difference?
December 03, 2008
Quality Time with My Husband
Sometimes we forget the people that God calls us to serve and give generously of ourselves to are those that we live with, our spouse and children. Enjoy the evening!
Confirmation - Christmas Party It Is!
Off to write invitations. (Forget the printer. Handwritten invites are much more 'Etsy-esque' or so I will convince myself.)
To Christmas Party Or Not to Christmas Party, That IS The Question!
What about opening my home to my neighbors (that I hate to say, I don't know very well after living here a little over a year) and hosting a small soiree? I truly love hosting a good party - probably more than attending them. But I also know that I can over commit myself during the busiest month of the entire year. Then it's not fun for me or my husband. Should I host a Christmas Party this year?
Since I'm committed to the Generosity Experiment, I think I need to take my own advice in all areas of my life. I did say that time spent with others and hospitality are a form of generosity, didn't I? (sheepish grin)
The party can be simple and fun. Everything doesn't have to be perfect, right? And my Christmas decorations are almost done. . . I think I can do this. Now, how do these invitations go in my printer?
'And get into the habit of inviting guests home for dinner.' - Romans 12:13
Lunch Money
As we were gazing at the list of scrumptious desserts on the chalkboard, I kept noticing a mother and daughter sitting next to the menu. The woman was older and the daughter was a 40+ woman with Down Syndrome. My heart ached for them. They didn't say much to each other, but ate their food and sipped their hot chocolate and tea. It's in these moments that I swallow tears back and ask 'Why?!' and at the same time think 'I hope that's not me someday.'
I looked across the table at my husband and tried to whisper to him what I wanted to do. The restaurant was loud and it took a couple of tries, but I finally was able to communicate the plan. He easily agreed. I quickly pushed back my chair, headed toward the kitchen, and found our waitress. I told her we wanted to pay for this mother and daughter's lunch. 'Just put their lunch on our bill and if they ask who did it, please don't tell them.' She simply smiled and told me she would take care of it.
As we ate our meal, I would occasionally glance their direction. Then the waitress brought their to-go box and placed her hand on the woman's back, as she leaned in to tell her the news. There was a pause and the woman looked up at the waitress with disbelief. I strained to hear what was being said, while I was trying to act like I was listening to my husband and working diligently as not to make anyone in the restaurant aware of what was taking place. They got up to leave. The woman passed by my chair, not realizing we were the gift givers. Her daughter looked straight at me and said 'Hi.' We both smiled and I replied, 'Hello.'
A few minutes later the cashier of the restaurant came to our table and asked if we were the ones that paid for their meal. I told her we were. She said, 'That woman told me that she was 79 years old and had NEVER had anyone EVER pay for her meal. She wanted me to thank whoever did such a nice thing and let them know how much she appreciated it.'
This mother and daughter twosome could have had 13 desserts each for all we cared. It didn't matter how much the bill was. We were going to treat them to lunch. But instead, they 'treated' us to a warm heart on a cold afternoon and a smile for the rest of the day.
Celebrating Real Heroes This Christmas: Making the Season Bright for U.S. Service Men & Women
You can send an inspirational card, like I will be doing, from DaySpring, or have your kids make one. Make sure you read the guidelines below so your generosity doesn't go to waste.
Please send cards to this address:
Holiday Mail for Heroes
PO BOx 5456
Capitol Heights, MD 20791-5456
- All cards must be postmarked no later than Wednesday, December 10, 2008.
- If sending more than one card, please mail all cards together in one large shipping envelope. Cards sent in this manner do not need individual envelopes or postage.
- Please ensure that all cards are signed.
- Please use generic salutations such as “Dear Service Member.”
- Please do not include personal information, like email or home addresses.
- Please do not send letters.
- Please do not include inserts of any kind, including photos, glitter, confetti, gift cards or calling cards. Any items inserted into cards will be removed during the reviewing process.
- All cards received may be used in program publicity efforts, including appearing in broadcast, print or online mediums.
This will probably be the cheapest give that you do all month. For the price of a stamp you'll encourage the men and women that are currently serving all over the world, their families, and Veterans that have given of themselves physically and emotionally through past conflicts and wars.
You can also carry on the support of the troops in prayer throughout the whole year. Find out more info.
Dec 3 - What Is True Generosity?
Generosity is a more complex word and not often used in our society today. I believe there is a reason for that. Generosity is defined as a readiness and liberality in giving. It's the freedom from smallness of mind and character. It's magnanimous! (I love that word!) Generosity is bountiful and abundant. Generosity is nobility in thought and behavior. (I really like where this is headed!)
The antonym of Generosity (that's the opposite of the word for those of you that are trying pull up the mental file from grade school English of what exactly that word means) is stingy, petty, mean, and selfish. Ouch.
Then there is the meaning of Giving: to yield, to give in, to concede, bestow a gift. You're probably thinking 'Giving doesn't sound too bad.' and 'How could it be any different than Generosity?' The defintition from my perspective was somewhat alarming.
When I looked up Giving, I naturally assumed that it would be almost identical to Generosity. But I was shocked to find that the definition doesn't sound very noble or inspirational at all. The definition of Giving sounds like I would be giving under pressure, almost a 'half to' kind of thing. Like I finally said, 'Okay, fine, I'll give. But don't make me do it again.'
So, on Day 3 of this Experiment, I ask you - What are you doing to countdown to Christmas? Are you being Generous or Giving? It's not a an issue about which word you use, but which definition you embody. Examine your heart and let me know what you find. I don't know about you, but I want to be noble and magnanimous!
"Your generosity will result in thanksgiving to God. " - 2 Cor 9:11
December 02, 2008
Paying It Forward
But this time, when I was at the drive-thru window, ready to pay, I interrupted the girl as she was rattling off my order and told her I wanted to pay for the car behind me. She stopped and smiled, really looking at me - in the eye. I'm hoping she saw something different.
I gave her the extra cash for both orders. As she handed me my food I gave her only one instruction, 'Please wish her Merry Christmas for me.'I rolled up my window, drove off with a big smile, and knew that was the best $5.41 I could have spent all day.
Feeling Anxious About Money this Christmas?
A friend of mine writes a great blog called I Believe God. He recently wrote a powerful short story that brought me peace and a smile to my face. Thanks Gregg!
http://greggstutts.blogspot.com/2008/11/jesus-by-my-side.html
Giving To Those That Are Sick
"Lord, when did we see you sick and did not help you?"
"He will reply, 'I tell you the truth, whatever you did not do for the sick, you did not do for me.'"
I had the opportunity today to pray for a friend that is waiting on test results to see if it's cancer - and I took it. I had the opportunity today to give money to help with medical bills for a co-worker that is fighting for her life - and I took it.
Who do you know that is battling an illness - even just a yucky cold - that you could pray for, financially help, sit with while they wait on test results, make chicken noodle soup for, or just call to check on? Remember, these are 'the least of these' and this could be your 'give' today. Take it!
Day 2 - Tuesday is Trash Day
I was picking up the kitchen from the night before and walked past the windows on my way to our recycle bin, when the trash truck stopped at our house. It's Tuesday so our trash is waiting at the curb for the truck to come whizzing by and whisk it away.
But my thoughts didn't go to the usual places like, 'I wonder how big the landfill is for our area?' or 'Why don't more people recycle?'. Nope. Today I wondered how cold it was outside. I wondered how these men do their much needed job every day in all types of weather and why I've never appreciated it before.
Yes, I do pay them for their services, but to truly give every day, I wondered what I could do for them that would let each of them know I've noticed them, I thank them, and I appreciate their work? Who knows, the guy on the back of the truck, all bundled up bracing against the cold, having to smell my trash and thousands of others, may need encouragement, a thank you, or maybe a small gift. I know I would if that was my job for even a day, much less for years. Maybe that's exactly what he needs from me. . . and you.
Think about all of those people that provide a much needed service for you - trash, mail, lawn, etc. - and figure out a way to say thank you and give them a little 'Christmas.' I would love to hear about it. Please share your stories with me and I'll get back to you about what I've decided to do for my trash men.
December 01, 2008
Day 1 - My Thoughts
Bruce Almighty was on TV last night. The feeling I have reminds me of scene where Jim Carrey is given all the powers of God and begins to hear the prayers of the world. He’s overwhelmed and can’t make out any of the voices or specific requests. He decides to answer ‘Yes’ to all of them. You remember what happens next, the world goes into chaos and millions of people have to share the lottery winnings. Believe me, I’m not implying that I’m God, but I do love to learn from the underlying themes of movies.
When I’m focused on the needs of others, it can be overwhelming and quickly creates in me the urge to help EVERYONE I meet. At this rate I could easily give up, since the goal seems much larger than my capacity to help or my resources to do it. I'm not going to stop world hunger by tomorrow morning. I'm not going to make sure every child has a gift this Christmas. I'm not going to be able to fund every wonderful ministry.
But I can start listening to the small voice inside that is answering my prayers and directing me to those in the most need - the ones that I was planned to help from the beginning. I can only do my part --- and the same goes for you. Take a deep breath with me, calm your spirit, and focus on the One that can truly give to those in need.
Day 1 - My First Give
I thought adopting an Angel would sort of be like filler for a day that was more difficult to find something to give or a day when I didn’t have an obvious opportunity. Well, I was wrong. Between you and me, I kind of think God wanted to get the ‘easy gives’ out of the way first. No waiting around. . . let the challenge begin. I get a sense that this experiment is going to test and eventually build up my faith if we’re starting with the Angel Tree. This could get interesting!
Our angel is Shawna. She is 30 years old and all she wants is pink sheets and clothes - size 8/10 pants and medium shirts. She’s the same age and size as me. The thought definitely crossed my mind – but for the grace of God go I. Thank you Lord for soft sheets, a cozy bed on a cold night, and a closet full of clothes just my size.
What was your ‘give’ today?
Countdown to Christmas - A New Kind of Advent
I consider myself a pretty giving person. I’m sure you do, too. But due to the economic events in our country, and now the world, I’ve been wondering what true generosity looks like. I’ve been praying for God to show me how He thinks about it. I found some great verses where He talks about just that in 1 Corinthians. One that stood out - ‘God will give you many opportunities to do good, and He will produce a great harvest of generosity in you.“
Then it hit me, this is the perfect time of the year to do a little challenge: starting Dec 1st, my countdown to Christmas will be to pray that God would show me every day an opportunity where I can truly give, that He will teach me what true generosity is, and that He would reap all of the honor and praise. What could be a better birthday present for Jesus?
As we were driving along, I started thinking about how to take the challenge as a family and what it would look like in daily life. One thing I quickly recognized is I have to do my part and be prepared. :
- There are different types of giving - time, money, serving, gifts, food, hospitality, patience, etc.
- Different types of people - family, friends, co-workers, neighbors, strangers, etc.
- I had to pray for the opportunities and listen
- I had to think in advance what I might need - cash in my pocket for those without, time to research ministries and organizations that need my time or money this season, or the forethought to recognize what was already in my closets not being used.
- I wanted to document my experience to keep me accountable, to keep focused every day, and help me to remember next year how God had worked in our lives.
- I wanted to share this idea with you and hopefully have you join me in this Generosity Experiment
So, I’m off to the bank to withdraw some cash so my husband and I will have money in our pockets for the next giving opportunity, followed by a Christmas shopping trip to the mall where I’m sure I will have plenty of chances to open doors for others, allow someone in front of me in line, drop more than some change in the Salvation Army kettle, and even buy lunch for the person behind me in the line at the food court.
Will you do the Generosity Experiment with me? Please let me know if you do. I’ll be posting my stories along with yours’. I’d love to hear your ideas, too, of creative ways to give. I can’t wait to see what God does through us this Christmas season.